So as most of you know, I had shoulder surgery on May 10. For those who care to know exactly what I had done, my labrum was torn from 12-6 oclock down the posterior. I had that tacked up, and then had a capsular shift to get rid of some instability. The tears in my shoulder are from playing fastpitch, and had gotten worse over the past year from benching and whatnot. Doc says Im gonna eventually have to have the left shoulder done as well if I want to keep lifting because of the amount of instability I have...He was able to dislocate both shoulders 75% prior to my surgery.
We keep telling everyone I either got bit by a tiger, shot by a gun, or the ever popular "you should see the other guy" response. Keep it on the hush hush.
The past couple of weeks have been extremely hard for me. I didnt even think I was going to make it through the first couple of days after surgery. I had never been in so much pain in my life. The pain killers they gave me barely helped and through me off balance...I fell down the stairs the day after surgery so that was fun times. Thankfully I landed straight on my ass, but my pride was pretty much broken. That was the first time I cried infront of my parents since I was a kid probably.
I couldnt shower, I couldnt eat without help, no driving, no working, no working out, couldnt change clothes. Basically just layed down for a couple days and slept. For those of you who know me well enough, that's pretty much like taking a trip to hell for me. I dont like to sit on my ass. Thank god for my cousin for taking care of me the whole first weekend. She washed my hair for me everyday, did my makeup, made sure I took my pills and iced, and constantly made sure i was comfortable and felt ok. (mind you, two and a half weeks later, shes still doing the same thing for me).
My first post-op appointment ( 3 days after my surgery) was pure hell. I had to take the brace off and get this thing moving a bit. I about passed out 3 times during that appointment. Great times.
The first time I was able to shower and change on my own was one of the best days of my life. Ive never been so happy about something so stupid. I made sure to text everyone to let them know I didnt smell like a pile of garbage anymore, and that i was becoming semi independent again. Oh the little things in life...
My first goal after surgery was to make it back to work the next Monday. My bosses pretty much laughed at me when I told them that. I overshot that landing a bit and wasnt able to work until the next Wednesday. I would say that Im pretty proud of myself for making it back that quick. I was able to drive finally...Its not that easy to have one hand and drive...Shifting and turning my key blow!
I started formal Physical Therapy the next Thursday at the PT clinic that I work at. Very convenient to have an appointment with a PT I've worked with for a year, and be able to get therapy right after getting off work. Also very convenient to have a brother who is a Physical Therapist so I can get help at home.
Fast forward a couple weeks later...I am stuck in a sling and abduction pillow for another 4 weeks. And since I am right hand dominant, Im pretty much useless. I was put on restriction from really doing anything physical. I can only do passive range of motion with my right shoulder for another 4 weeks. Right now Im stuck at about 90 degrees of flexion and 20 degrees of external rotation. My goals for the next couple of weeks are 120 degrees and 45 degrees. Its not looking great right now as my shoulder is extremely tight and gets sore at the endpoints of my range. My PT says I have to just push through the pain as much as possible to get to where I need to be. Therapy was very rough this week trying to get a good range, and it pretty much knocked me on my ass afterwards. I have been told that therapy is gonna continue to get harder and harder as we try to regain more range...not looking forward to it.
Right now I can pretty much do everything on my own- minus my hair and scratching my left arm (thanks for the help Kree).
I want to work out more than anything. Lifting and running have been more helpful with my depression than the medication I'm on, so this is exceptionally hard for me to deal with. I try to stay as active as possible, but about all I can really do without hurting myself is walking or biking. It's discouraging and I cant seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel at this point. I know I'll get there eventually but its gonna be a very long and hard recovery. Ive been told I may never be able to bench press again, but there's still that chance. What's a powerlifter without benching? I cant rely on deadlifting and squatting alone if I want to compete in the future still. Obviously Im gonna miss my deadline of competing by November this year, but hopefully Ive got a lot of life to live and I'll someday be able to make my goal.
I just keep trying to push myself to keep going every day. I know eventually I'll get back to being super active again. Thankfully, Im lucky enough to be surrounded by amazing people through this whole thing. All my friends and family have been super supportive and have never ceased to remind me that I WILL get through this and that it's just another hill to climb. I also have the people who force me to stop being upset or sad or lazy and keep me on my feet and keep me active. I need that more than anything right now. I've had to catch myself feeling sorry for myself alot in the past 2 weeks. I cant do that or this is gonna get the best of me.
Ive got a list of shoutouts to make if you dont mind...
Mom- thank you for taking the day off work to take care of me after surgery and for making sure I had my pills and water and food and ice constantly.
Dad- thank you for not treating me like a cripple and for reminding me of my weight lifting goals.
Kree- Thank you for taking care of my hair, my face, for helping me shower and change, for driving me around all the time, for keeping me active and making sure I was having fun and smiling constantly, for being extremely overprotective, and for putting up with my whiney ass 24/7
Phil and Kell- thank you for the ace wrap bra and for opening up your house to me if I ever need help.
John and Lindz- thank you for being my at home therapists. Lindz thanks for your skills with a razor lol!
Aunts, Uncles, Gram, cousins- thank you for the get well cards and the good wishes and for being the best family ever.
My JCC family- Thanks for letting me come back to work with one arm and continue to train people, and for helping me get my red shirt on and off :) I love my job.
My VASJ family- I miss you all more than anything. Thank you for the huge get well card and the flowers. So proud to be a Viking!
Random friends and people- Thanks for being the reason I smile and laugh all the time. You all make it so much easier to get out of bed in the morning. And you push me to want to shower and look half way decent because god knows I dont go out in public looking like crap.
If I missed anyone, feel free to punch me in my shoulder.
